Stephen Bright

"Platter came out eventually and the bread was mouldy. Took another 20 minutes to get new bread. No apology from staff, almost like we were inconveniencing them. Sorry your bread was mouldy..."

"Waited an hour to get a cheese and cured meat platter. Show me where the fridge is and I'll do it myself..."

"To my loyal E3 minions. Due to a recent online hacking by a group of IT anarchists the bus checker has been inaccurate. We appreciate your patience while we deal with this situation. Regards, Mayor"

"Awesome toasted paninis"

"Watch out for enormous man-eating rodents!"

"Leave yourself an extra few minutes if you're buying a ticket from the machine. The screen is scratched and it's hard to push the buttons you want"